Love the Ocean
Love your Life

Finally Life is opening up like the Ocean
under the open sky
I'm going to find my freedom
And dreams
Bring them into my Life
Enjoy by the Ocean...

so far it's a slightly better day?!?
cos i've used the "interchange dock" thruout UBS (sth like irc) to chat wif some other NTU interns...=)
so it wun be tat boring...=p...and so had lunch wif them as well...
onli a few instruments for me to create, done within minutes...so the rest of the morning, i was basically surfing web, lookin into yahoo groups, and chatting...and the morning passed by rather fast...praying for the rest of the day will pass by smoothly too....=p

every wed is the fruits day...wierd rite?? i nv heard of such day in a company la...but it's so for UBS...and every staff get fruits...last week was orange...today apple and banana...healthy lifestyle is impt =0..haha...tink i gonna bring home and show it to my mama first haha...

finally walked one big round of the whole 16th floor office which consists of diff depts...cos wan to go and look for other ntu peeps over at the other side...felt so different, altho all r on the same level...over there (mainly financial control and the acct students r there), it's so quiet, so serious feeling...unlike securities operation (where me and the other BnF students are in), it's so much friendlier and noisy...haha...oops...

asked around, none other than 1 would like to watch 'rent' with me...still under serious consideration to watch it or not...the last time i spent C$20 (abt S$27, abt RM60) for the last min deal (sg doesn't seem to hav tis kinda of thing) and sat at the first row...despite being the first row, it was still awesome, neck not pain wor...but tis time round, it'll be far far back at S$78 + some sistic charges...eh...haiz...wat a big diff...i jus wan to see wat's the effect of a diff cast...but maybe i should give up tat idea and wait for 10 yrs later, go NY and watch............ya maybe tat's wat i should do...it will also be less than S$78....but how often can u find an pop asian star in such a musical?!?!?....*dilemma*

hav tried to find things to do...recopy and organise my learning notes...and hence, i'm back here...sleepy sleepy...these few days gotta wake up before 7am...haiz...it seems to be a long long time since i woke up when the sky is still dark...realli pei fu those who gotta wake up so early to go for work or school...tat's y now i've to set 2 diff timing alarms...maybe even 3 in the future...tat kinda of timing is juz too good to slp man...plus nowadays, weather is cooling...can't wait for sat to be here den i can wake up late...
not only waking up early, i hav to slp early too...but my bio clock not cooperating...i used to slp after 12 every nite...now wan to slp early, like even 11pm, is so hard...gotta tune and tune and tune...=p...so dun be taken aback by my panda eyes...=p...

tink i should stop bloggin and see wat else i can do...=)
3.54pm signing off...

i reached home today ard 9pm...juz before the heavy rain poured...the lighting striked.

i'm in terrible state now...emotionally,mentally, physically, socially...

need to slp......zzzzzzz

~*how i wish you are right here where i can easily find you, but by being here, i can't miss you*~

Sianz...Sianz...Sianz...
恨不得他们快点叫我回家...
they wun hav anything for me to do from now till i knock off lor...
wat's the point???
u muz be tinking...i should feel happy, no need to do anything oso hav money into the pocket...
but cmon la..u will feel happy to hav nothin to do, nothin to read (at least u can't 光明正大max the internet explorer window...), nobody to tok to..?? sorri, i'm juz such an anti-social person...i can't be bother to go round to interact wif strangers...=p

the onli meaningful thing to do now is to blog lor...
but other than grumbling away...i've nothin to say le...
i feel tat 有与世隔绝的感觉.....maybe come tis weekend, i'll be brought back to the real world again...
suddenly, all my dreams jus seem so far away...maybe cos things aren't always as easy as it may seem... or maybe i've been jus too naive...
突然觉得，我根本不应该读什么大学...好像有点浪费了时间与金钱...我不适合有立足之地的地方...我只适合平平淡淡,简简单单的生活...

ok...it's 6.05pm now...suddenly got things for me to do...how good can it be...

Time to wind up a little:

There's trouble in Toy Town. 44 year-old Barbie Doll may have sold close to one billion units worldwide, but she is said to be considering filing an age and gender discrimination suit against her makers, Mattel. She is also thought likely to throw in an harassment charge. Barbie's global sales are currently 13% down and the plastic doll is said to be concerned that Mattel has not been giving her the same kind of profile competitors like Bratz give to younger rival dolls.

Barbie is believed to have got her idea to file suit from the long line of discrimination claims currently facing the corporate world. Insiders say that Barbie feels that she is suffering from a frumpy image and that younger buyers are being encouraged to purchase funkier rival dolls. Barbie is also believed to be angry that she retails at less than male competitors like Action Man and points to the fact that, at one time, her former boyfriend Ken was a more expensive item than she was.

Sources close to Barbie say that she has also been upset by a number of recent incidents that are alleged to have occurred in the workplace. She has apparently told a close friend that she tried to discuss her concerns with her immediate boss last month, but his response was to pull off one of her legs and tell her to 'hop it'. It is also alleged that a drunken male colleague made lewd comments to Barbie at a recent gala event. The colleague is said to have accidentally dropped his cigarette butt on the plastic doll - with unfortunate consequences. Barbie is thought unlikely to file a claim until she has fully recovered from the extensive plastic surgery she has recently had to undergo as a result of the alleged incident.

A spokesperson for Mattel said that 'my only comment on this story is that it is a complete work of fiction'.

=)

tink i can jus blog every single day man......
how to ask things to do when there's nothin tat they tink u can do....
and the onli thing i can do, is to look at the computer screen...w/o much freedom to access certain things...
all the pre-excitement and hopes are being washed down to the drain...
if onli i can find someone to chat wif...=p...i wun be so damn bored here...ArGh...
whenever tis kind of feeling comes, u'll den realize, afterall, u din't hav many frenz...
life is too superficial...肤浅肤浅肤浅
how much hav u said tat is right from ur heart...
当你对生活有一种无奈时，你会怎么办呢？
想要好好的工作都不行...突然想念sushi tei...=p

can't believe i actually dare to blog away right here in the office (in front of the big boss)...and soon i can go home =)...one day has past jus like tat again...wif a bit more stuffs for me to do...but made a lot of MISTAKES...=p...better than nothin to do bah...

finally met the last lady...a young and nice and sweet lady =)...who looks jus like someone i noe but can't rem..

wat i've always feared to hear was finally out...haiz...wat am i goin to do?!?!? i jus dunno how to go about revealing the truth...am i jus avoiding? sorri is of no use i noe...

jus spending my time away waiting for something to do or knock off...........i need to meet my happy folks gang! ringed me up after ur exams!!!

yeah..mum loves the bracelet =)

how issit like to miss a person???
how will u feel when someone misses u, but u r missing another person badly too???
how to put down everything, so tat, 'missing' is out of sight...

woke up later than yesterday, but reached earlier than yesterday...i was practically strolling whenever i walk..
den settled down wif a cup of milo at the pantry, sitting by the window, looking at 'Today'.
den waited blankly...for the person who's supposed to guide me today...btw, hav i mentioned tat in the team tat i'm in (STATIC) there's like 3-4 guys, 1 lady and one chio poly intern having last week next week..so the person guiding me is actually wheelchair bound..yupz..but amazingly he can work like any other ppl can and he's quite a nice guy..

abt the others, the chio poly intern..ya chio and very nice too, always smiling..

the team leader, a taiwanese...eh, no comments abt him cos i din't tok much to him..

the other 'powerful' guy after the team leader..wah, if he nv smile, face fierce like dunno wat man, dun dare to 惹他, but once he smiles, it's different case...BUT, i oso din't tok to him much, and even if i did, for work sake, he nv smiles and so it's his fierce face...haiz...

another one, gd social skill type...but our paths onli crossed yesterday, cos he was the onli one ard to be able to guide me..=p

the lady still haven seen her yet, cos she wasn't ard for the past 2 days...

continue wif my day work..yup helped wif the creation and amendment of the instruments being traded by UBS. and i realised it's not the kind of creation i had in mind when i first got to read the job scope..it's rather a routined task, and it's more of entering the info into the computer...(shit, due to the compliance talk yesterday, i'm so aware of wat i'm saying, such tat i wun breach the confidentiality wif the company...shitto!) yup, so i'm starting to wonder, i studied so much for wat...i mean, the work task, dun realli require wat i've learnt so far lor, maybe except for terms like, equity, debt, bond, funds, rights, warrants etc, which can be easily known from dictionaries (financial dictionaries)...maybe i'm onli seeing one side...but tis definitely affect wat i tink of my future...

kk..enuff of blabberin...time to slp!!! and celebrate mum's bday tml...for once i declared myself an impulsive buyer, cos i juz went into the first shop, saw the first thing in mind and bought it at a not too low price...3 digit leh wat do u tink...haiz...pray hard tat she likes...if she doesn't den i shall use it myself hahaha....

eh..muz say i dun hav a gd start for the day, but luckily it ended ok...and i realli mean o-k onli.
woke up early, to get all prepare and to be able to leave home early, but...found my onli skirt to hav a spoiled zip..so i can't wear it..i hav been relying on tis skirt all along..and i din't bother to check it the nite b4..argh..so changed into pants after much consideration..(cos..it's complicated, dun bother to explain anymore..)
and so, i went out late..and my shoes was hurting..(not too new, but dun wear often, tat's y..=p)8.30am i was supposed to report for work, but i was outside raffles shoppin centre, waiting for a cab. And stupidly, i let the stupid driver drove down till SMU there and U-turn back to Suntec, when he could make the u-turn a few streets before there...................wasn't in the mood to go and bother abt the driver le..finally reached, realized it doesn't matter if i was a bit late...
reached there safe and sound, i was relieved...den waited wif another NTU intern, who oso started today cos of BF325 too...
finally, we were brought to our own department...fyi, there r abt 6 NTU interns @ UBS tis sem, and all of us r in diff teams (although some in the same dept)...i was amazed at the complicated-ness of the organization...so not goin to elaborate on tat...
As usual, i guess, my first day consists of looking at some guidelines, have a slight feel of wat my job is goin to be like (which seems routined), met the impt ppl ard, attend the dept's weekly meeting, attend a few hours talk in the video conference room (and unexpectedly, there would be a video conference right after the talk, so juz b4 the talk ended, get to see video conference setting up on the other side--Hong Kong), and last but not least...looking at the many emails in a day which i dun get involve in any...and STARING INTO SPACES!!!...
and got to noe my working hrs: 8.30am-7.30pm or 10am - end of day(which is like 9pm or so)...but i got to leave a bit early than usual, 6+pm...cos there's simply nothin i can do there yet...
haiz...
i'm so afraid i'll spend a lot in the next 2 mths...shopping along citylink and suntec...pretty clothes r everywhere!!! today i'm juz tired and worn out, esp by the shoes to do tat...
i dunno i could actually be so tired without doin much things...
tml, i'll...cos it's dress down day, so can be so much more carefree!!!

sushi tei, afraid hav to say good-bye for the time being...i'll miss workin there..i'll miss the gossips, the happenings tat i'm gonna miss out =p

日久见人心。
真的是这样吗？
那我也被蒙蔽了太久了吧！
你的事，我以后不会再理了。
我不需要这样的朋友。
是你一而再，再而三地让我必须披上防备之装，开始对你完全的不信任了。
所以，别怪我！

back from genting trip, back from one day of work..got a call to start PA late, so i can 安心study for my last paper =)..phew..i'll jiayou, with some motivation i hope =)

Genting trip not bad, altho spent alot(on dunno wat somemore =p), felt it's worth it though..=) a memorable trip wif frenz..
And was able to look for Sam @KL =) *happyhappy*...both of us jus kept finding changes in each other whenever we see each other, and it's 向横发展的不一样haha..when has someone actually said i can be like a pig le huh?!?..he seems to be the first one...argh...but he's realli a bit diff le, maybe cos he has gone into the workin society. i feel the need to catch up man..=p
And met another long-lost fren of OBS Lumut, HHH...who actually drove a Benz, eh, well, no comments though. He still looks very the same, unlike some other ppl ( I mean Sam haha)..

I'm more aware of where I want to lead myself to le...
我要尽我所能，达到我要的理想。
但对于某件事情，我只有耐心地等待 =)

oh had my 2nd time @ cafe cartel, again it's free tis time, cos supervisor tio bei bio, so she treated me and some others hahz... so is tis the fate btw me and cafe cartel? oops...

i've always trusted my sixth sense, the women's intuition, but y i can't even use it on certain things, on certain ppl...for the past few yrs...

Finally had my first meal at Cafe Cartel.
Ok, yup say i sua gu bah...hahz.
But I can get to eat everything FREE wor. How's that?
Eh, not tat i 贪小便宜...i'm jus eh..lucky? haha
finally found a place where i had my fav combi of pasta - cream sauce with loads of mushrooms - the forest of mushrooms pasta. not sickening after finishing the whole plate, so it's a thumbs up =)
the manager even wan us to stay longer for desserts, but too bad, i'm rather full
and for the sake of BF325, i went back to sushi tei and study!
if not it'll be great eating dessert, sweet desserts with J..

in diff people's point of view, a person can be good or bad in certain way...i used to tink my mgr, well, not too bad..but at least from today, i'm starting to tink, FL, my supervisor will be better, at least she'll always be there to help...so unlike mgr...haiz...cafe cartel(serangoon garden)'s mgr oso seem not too bad in interacting wif ppl..too bad their pay is jus too low...hahz

Self-discipline is such a difficult task. =p..there r a lots of things tat need discipline...i can't SwAy...i need to be FirM.....

i can feel exams finished period..when in fact i haven realli finish mine =)

i'm awaiting to go genting..can't be bother by the company goin le..eh i dun mean u jea..

and awaiting wang zi bian qing wa VCDs and Initial D's (wif Jay in it) big poster =)...

11th nov 12.45am
Tired...slept w/o finishing my recorded wang zi bian qing wa. =p
eh, heng i'm goin to start PA soon, which hopefully wun be as tiring bah...=p
and finally i noe wat i want, and wat i dun. so mouths out there, better shut them up, else dun blame me for being unfrenly...
again heng i'm goin to start PA soon, i wun need to face the mouths and him. =)
yup, bad ger i noe..but i hav my own life to live..

i'm starting to wonder if i will hav fun in the coming trip.
i'm wondering if...haiz...forget it...some ppl can jus nvr wake up from wrongdoings...

7th nov
2nd paper over le...wah realli can copy and paste the notes into the answer booklet. but i feel wierd doin so, so waste my time abit here and there to tink wat i shld write..hahz..eh again jus aiming for a pass...*pray hard*

after tat, tried to rush home, but eh, reached home late than expected...and rushed to make-up, do my hair...haiz...i shld hav jus take a cab home from sch, and avoid the rushness, hate it...and den there's the jam, which made us late in arriving at the hotel for Sushi Tei's 11th DnD anniversary...heng not so paiseh, cos the table tat we sitted was juz by the main entrance...it was quite a fun nite...too bad, all of the SG staffs din't get to sit close tog..otherwise can all scream and yell tog...seems to take a lot of photos, but realize some r blurred...=(...nvm waiting for others' cam...there were still lil episodes, esp like ppl getting drunk...and ppl, who for dunno wat reason, kept drinking, hoping to get drunk...and was indeed a bit drunk...haiz...and made so many ppl starting to wonder wat's wrong wif her...连我都看不过去，真想打醒她...
anyway, there is Ms Sushi Tei pageant, and the winner is at Paragon, <dinko> ur fav sushi tei outlet...=) but SG oso hav chio ones, too bad the judges dunno how to 欣赏...
food wasn't tat great...so later all of us went for dim-sum supper...ordering a bit too much food...but the nite was realli great, cos of you? :) but u r really stubborn =p...hope to hav more outings like tis wif them =)...

Today
3rd( 2nd last paper) paper...french...one word: DIFFICILE!!! past yr papers r so much much more easier!!! firstly, the compre is the hardest i've encountered. secondly, u r required to know a lot about FRANCE!!! which i happily left out cos i tot they wun ask any, and jus conc on my vocab and grammer...WT!?!?!? but i guess i am able to pass, most confident with moi conjugation...=)

anyway, was a bit free durin exam, and realized one thing: abt half a yr ago, i hav to wear a lot and so thick to go into the exam hall, den take off every possible layer...now i wear one piece into the exam hall, and put on more to keep myself warm...hahz...how nice ya?

tidy up my room and study desk le...=)...but it's oso time to start revising my BF325, can't afford to do badly for tat...gambatte...starting to work daily again =)

2nd nov
1st paper today...selective reading...not bad still can sit thru the whole of 2 and a half hrs with 2 and a half questions sort of complete...yup sort of...not fully complete...so can onli aim for a 'D'...

我开始主动了。
为了是不让彼此尴尬。为了让他感到开心...
这一切是我的心在作祟？还是我的理智无法让我伤害他？
现在感觉上已经有点模糊不清了。

糟糕！
现在听见杰伦的新歌就联想到他。

on cloud 9 now...=)
cos of pa
and added new songs by jay =)

Through the laughters
Through the tears
Through the days
Through the months
Through the coming years
I am grateful
Just because of You
JL ♥ JW

I miss you
I love you
I am not making use of you
I dont want to hurt you
I dont want to bring tears to you
I only want to make you happy
I want you in my life forever...

i want you
i want happiness
i want dreams
i want a life that's called my own

My Shutterfly
Photo Blog
LiveJournal
sis
ah yap
daisy
dearest
dinko
donald
jo
jun
lixuan
margaret
tyw
yali
yiwen
kingone
judy
tingwei
weddings

January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
March 2011
June 2011
September 2011

it should stay here for good :)
codes&image: ohsolovelyy
photo: found in this site
host: photobucket